[ sadly, the mild death wouldn't come for him so easily. perhaps next time, he'll think about investing in the spicy kind instead. ]

Actually, I do! Okay, here's the first one: so, we should label the pair with our names and hang them up to dry. That way, when the thief comes to take them, it'll be really obvious that the underwear belong to us!

[ and hopefully no questions will arise to why two grown men (one VERY grown) are sharing a pair of silk panties. ]

How does that sound? I mean, it's not the most creative, but... well, we're not looking to hurt the thief, right?

[ is violence the answer to their problem? ]